Monday, July 27, 2015


I'm in a
nerd dilemma:

I've read the studious articles 
and seen the impassioned chats
about the proper order for
nerd parents
to show their nerdlings
the Star Wars hexology,

but I realized yesterday
that a nerd father is faced with
oh so many more perplexities
than these 6 movies 
and the 720*
possible sequences
in which they could be watched.

For instance,
what's the best way 
to inculcate in one's
burgeoningly geeky offspring
a love for Weird Al?
Start with the earliest songs
to build context, 
or with the latest
to be most relevant?

And what about the 
cult classics of
Monty Python and the Holy Grail,
Dr. Strangelove, The Goonies,
Young Frankenstein, Princess Bride, & etc...?
How should these be presented such that
the geeklets might get
the inside jokes
and know the
token quotes -
those passwords and signs
which are requisite to enter geekdom?

And what of the larger question here about the
dangers of accidentally rendering such nerdifacts uncool
through the double-edged sword of
parental endorsement?

I need some sort of
theoretical framework,
researched argument, or
longitudinal study
to know the quick and easy path
for raising my son right!

I try in vain
to reason my way through this remote
yet immediate enigma
and see the solution.

Then, in a blue haze, Ben Kenobi speaks to me,
padawanizing me for my attempt to
think my way through this jedi's puzzle:
"Let go your conscious self
and act on instict."

"Help me Obi-Wan Kenobi,"
Indeed. This is my only
and new hope.

source here

*Thanks are due to my brother-in-law David Jensen, a math teacher, for confirming this number. What a travesty it would've been to include an inaccurate calculation in such a nerdy poem. 

Monday, July 20, 2015

The Sound of (Wind in the) Music

Whenever I play certain songs
on the piano,
I hear wind
moving through trees

and feel it moving through
blowing always from the right,
leaning me left.

This phenomenon does not occur
because the piano is 
next to the front bay window that
looks out on three 80-foot silver maples.

And, no, the rustling of those
imagined leaves
does not coincide with the
music's crescendos and decrescendos.

It just
as if I were a limb
of some larger thing
being moved. 

Monday, July 13, 2015

Lego Limericks (with pics!) - for Janette

My son's into Lego constructions.
He was just a slave to instructions.
He watched Lego Movie,
Now builds things quite groovie;
He makes mostly novel productions.

My son's also into destruction,
Which is a key lego-ing function.
He used to break toys
Like a pre-school Hulk-boy;
Now he sticks with intentional reductions.

A Pete Call original.
Our collaborative effort based on Pete's idea to make the monster truck a spaceship.
The first in my robot series - Noodle Arms.
How Santa mines those diamonds for expensive jewelry.

A landspeeder we made together.
Another Pete Call original.

Some sort of puttering spaceship. 
A duck. By Pete.

Part 2 of my robot series - Near-sighted Dog. 

Pete's magnum opus - an homage to the Power Ranger Megazord.

Monday, July 6, 2015

Haikus for Baby Wearing

Mom is gone, so I,
Dad, scrambling for you to nap,
strap you in. We waltz.

You won't fall asleep.
I nestle you in and walk
then sit. We both snore.

Strapping you on and
sashaying 'round while it rains.
Dew drops cuddling.

My stubble scratched you;
now we're even - your duck fluff
keeps tickling my chin.

My bro and I wearing our babies.
Photo from my wife - Kim Call - here.