Phonewich

It was a spur of the moment word
she uttered
when describing what she did
to rectify the dreaded
phone-fell-in-the-toilet
incident.

"There was no rice,"
she explained,
"so I put 2 pieces of bread on top
and 2 pieces on bottom
and sealed it in a ziploc."

I googled this seemingly freshly minted
coin of the English language
to see if it had already been uttered,
(as I so often find with words
I thought should be proprietarily mine,
like "infinition" or "thith").

All I found were people foruming about phones,
writing "wich" instead of "which" afterwards,
like "im looking for a phone wich has a keyboard"

as well as this picture:

Picture source here.

Given that Google couldn't prove
anyone else had concocted
this delicious compound word
which so perfectly evokes a common
21st century American intersection
of technology, tragedy, and DIY folk wisdom,
I told her to copyright it.

She said she had gone to snapchat it,
but her phone was in a bag.